Just walk away

Despite my mother’s insistence that the girls “be nice and only say nice things,” there has been conflict a-plenty between them. But now that I’m staying out of most of it, I’m not even sure what most of it is about. Last night while we waited for them to announce they were ready for bedtime books and visits, it sounded something like this: “Owwww! Stoooooop!” “What?!” “Don’t doooo thaaaat! Why did you dooo thaaat!!” … “Ewww! Stooooop! Clean that up!!!!” … “I will…” “You have to clean all of that up!” … “Charlotte!!!!” “Noooo, noooo, noooo, aaaaaaeeeeeeiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!” “Charlotte! Stop screaming! … Ellen don’t do that!” And then some crying and a little more yelling. It got so bad at one point that Jerry said, “I don’t think they should get any time with us tonight. This behavior is unacceptable and we should tell them that nobody gets any time with us.” “Uh….hmm…I know what you mean, but … I’ve tried it all, honey. The kind of thing you’re talking about — punishment, lectures, threats — it just doesn’t work…So we’ve got to stick with this. And did you notice that with all that conflict, not one of them ran in here to say, ‘Mooooom, Daaaaaad she did this and she did that!’? That’s pretty amazing.”

It was amazing. Charlotte especially let out some truly blood-curdling screams and didn’t ask to be rescued once. And when they finally said, “Ready!” and I went into Charlotte’s room, she was happily tucking herself in as though nothing bad had just happened. Hmm. Note to self: when we stop behaving as though she needs to be rescued, she stops needing to be rescued.

Meanwhile on the life skills front, Fenner announced that she was out of clean underwear and that I needed to do laundry soon. So I said, “Tell you what, you get your dirty clothes together and I’ll show you how.” Her immediate response was, “Awwwww, noooooooo.” But about an hour later she said, “Mom, let’s do the laundry together tomorrow.” It’s a date.

Explore posts in the same categories: Week 3: Timeline for Training

2 Comments on “Just walk away”

  1. Mandy Says:

    I’ve followed your blog while I was in POT class (two years ago) and now am re-reading as my husband attends – what stands out to me is how good you are at looking on the bright side, finding the silver lining and pointing it out to your family. (at least when they were fighting no one asked for mom or dad). That’s one thing that I struggle with and am trying to improve. Thanks for the reminders!

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